Today’s blog post is very much inspired by my friends podcast Hero’s Breath, this podcast is very much opening my mind and I’m very grateful for that. This last week my health has not been great and it has been a struggle, but what I came to realise by listening to this podcast was life is like a tapestry.
So often in my life I have been asked how I can have faith in God when there is so much famine, war and pain in the world. How can I love a God that allows people to suffer and animals to be in pain etc, especially by my atheist father!
But if you can imagine a tapestry from the back, it looks messy, you cannot tell what the picture is meant to be and it just looks awful. Unless the person making it tells you what it is generally you just have no idea. Imagine God is the tapestry and our lives are the threads, as we look at it with our human brains and try to understand things it just looks a mess!
Last week I suddenly became ill, I woke up Thursday morning feeling not right, I couldn’t put my finger on it but I did not feel good. I got dressed and before I could go downstairs I was sick, then not long after I was sick again and a lot and it looked like coffee grounds which can be a sign of bleeding.
My husband rushed home from work, he called an ambulance and they assessed me but the tests they did showed nothing so they told me to rest. I was sick many times that day and though I was not sick Friday I was drained and in so much pain.
We called my local doctor who sent me to A&E at a hospital about an hours drive from us so they could do tests and look into things. We were there for hours and they found everything was normal, which if you are a chronic illness warrior you are probably used to hearing!
Today is Monday I didn’t stay in hospital I have been resting, and I am starting to feel like myself again which I am so thankful for. But maybe we will never know what it was that made me sick, I felt so dreadful and yet maybe there are no answers as to why.
Just like when we see people in pain, when we hear people do not care about the planet, or hear conspiracy theories about the worlds governments we may never get the answers as to why. But that is because we cannot see the tapestry that we are making, all we can do is try to learn and grow from every experience we have.
So next time life seems messy or to not make sense, try to question why it might be happening, what is life trying to teach you? Remember life is like a tapestry and we don’t know the picture that is being made we just need to be patient and have faith.