Knowing that my body is struggling, doesn’t mean that I find it easy to slow down, no I’m still learning to rest!!
I spoke last week about how my health is doing right now, and no it isn’t good to be honest it’s a struggle. Dealing with myalgic encephalomyelitis as well as long covid is like trying to stay awake for a week while living a normal life!
As well as trying to keep my YouTube channel going, I’m a disabled carer for my mother and I have hobbies. I’ve spoken before how important hobbies are, but it’s not easy to do them when your body just wants to nap!
I am a very logical person though, so I’ve been trying to figure out how to cope with my new fatigue levels. I’ve been doing certain things to try and help and trying to learn to rest. Which isn’t easy when we are taught by a capitalist society that our worth only comes from how much we contribute.
Learning to rest
- Lie in – I find myself needing more time in bed, my brain is so foggy in the morning and my pain spikes at night. So, I have been going to bed about 8pm and watching tv in bed resting my body and sitting in bed most of the morning so my brain has time to wake up.
- Sit in between – I have been sitting between each activity which means I can get a lot less done each day. However, it has allowed me to really be present and less foggy during each thing I need to get done.
- One thing at a time – there is a lot of pressure to multitask, but I find it far better to do one thing at a time. Being mindful during each job allows me to not overload my brain and get tired faster.
- Tidy as I go – I find leaving things around to tidy or put away later soon becomes a habit that leaves me a huge job later. Tidying and putting away small amounts as I go is less taxing on my body and easier to look after.
- Don’t worry – I realised a lot of pressure was put on me by myself! My own thoughts making me feel as if I cannot make people wait for me. Taking this pressure away has been incredible and has allowed me to rest without worrying because I will do that thing when I can. If people know I am disabled, generally they understand.
- Change how it’s done – I’m typing this in bed, it’s about lunchtime, but that means I’m both resting and getting the job done. When I cook or shower, I sit, if you can rest and do a job do it because it will make such a difference.
The main thing I have learned from having so little time I can do things each day, is that I can only do my best. Most people understand and appreciate I’m doing my best when I explain why there is a wait.
The people who are unwilling to give you time and be caring are not the people you need in your life. I have been working a lot on learning to love myself and to look after myself better, people who don’t get it don’t deserve to have my limited time and energy.
It might sound harsh, but I have come to realise than I am worth more than the things I can do and once I realised this, I started to change how I viewed the world. I give a lot to the world, I create videos and blog posts to educate and to help, as well as caring for my mom.
I am sure when you think about it, you are giving more out than society might view as important but really most of the time it’s those things that matter more. I miss being able to work of course I do, but I know that I would if I could, it is not my fault my body is not able to do what the world sees as important.
So, if you have energy limits due to your health, remember you can only do your best, remove those negative thoughts and you will be surprised how much it helps. Learning to rest without guilt is a game changer and has helped my mental health so much.
Thank you xx