I think we have all had times when pacing goes wrong and end up doing so much more than you meant. It is part of living with chronic illnesses that cause fatigue, and so is the guilt! So I thought it was time we talk about this.
Monday was a good day, they are rare and usually I take my time and do little jobs that are usually too much. I was good, I paced and managed a little yoga, before going online and getting caught up with emails. I was being good, but my husband, who has epilepsy, was not.
No Lee was over at our storage container, we moved a few months ago and we are waiting to do some work on the house. He was organising and then decided to bring our bed frame over so we could sleep in our bed. He bought it back, took apart the bed we had been sleeping on, and then started rebuilding our bed.
I went to help him, which involved holding things, passing things, and standing for a while! Afterwards we were so tired we ordered a pizza and after that I felt so tired and in so much pain. However, I still needed to help mom into bed and then get myself settled…yeah I knew what was coming!
I woke up this morning feeling so drained and sick from the pizza which always tastes nice but leaves me feeling yucky. I stayed in my pjs, had a lie in and then just chilled on the sofa with my dog, even ending up being able to shower and get dressed!
When Pacing Goes Wrong:
So what changed? How did I not end the day feeling useless and guilty?
- Let go of guilt – Yeah you didn’t listen to your body and pace, but that is ok it happens. Not everything goes as planned, it never can that is life. So stop beating yourself up for it and chalk it up to a learning moment.
- Rest – Listen to your body, after doing too much you need to rest so do it. Say no to things you cannot do now and just chill out, jobs and things you want to do can wait.
- Put off till tomorrow – I know it goes against everything we are taught, but that dusting, or washing or whatever it is can wait. Tomorrow will be a much better day if you just put your feet up and not force yourself.
- Ask for help – If you have people around you who are able to do the things you are not, ask. Often the people around us want to help and be there for us but they don’t want to push in. Inviting them to help by cooking something for you, or doing a few little things might go down better than you imagine.
- Be kind to yourself – Maybe this is an opportunity? Maybe it is time for some self care? What if you do a face mask? Or take a relaxing bath? Self care is wonderful for your mental health and can be so great for putting that smile back on your face.
I really hope this article helps you to be a bit gentler when pacing goes wrong. Tell me what your self care plans are when you rest and how you let go of the guilt of resting?
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